


Forget Me Not

by Seventeenteenteen (ChrisIsAnAngel)



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M, Temporary Amnesia, Wedding Rings, What Have I Done, pls don't hate me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-26
Updated: 2018-08-26
Packaged: 2019-07-02 09:49:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15794055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChrisIsAnAngel/pseuds/Seventeenteenteen
Summary: Seungcheol felt that familiar pang in his chest again but it didn’t affect him much today because he had already been walking around with a dull ache throbbing in his chest the entire day. Why? Today was their wedding. Well, it was supposed to be their wedding day.





	Forget Me Not

_ The weather was nice and cool out, the birds were chirping and it wasn’t too sunny. Seungcheol thought it would be the perfect day for a picnic but he wasn’t about to sit alone outside so he called Jeonghan.  _

_ “It’ll be our first date,” he said. “I’ll prepare everything so all you need to do is show up, Han.”  _

_ Jeonghan, at the thought of free food, agreed to the date and got Seokmin to help him pick out some clothes. The park wasn’t too far from where Jeonghan lived so he took his time walking over. He was, admittedly, feeling jittery at the thought of a first date with Seungcheol. He spotted Seungcheol as soon as he got to the park, the other had already placed the blanket down under a shady spot and was taking out the food.  _

_ Seungcheol smiled and paused his actions as soon as he saw Jeonghan approaching him. And suddenly Jeonghan was hit with a wave of nostalgia. The smell of the freshly mowed grass, the chirping of the birds and the way Seungcheol looked under the tree, it felt all too familiar. They’ve been in the very park before, they’ve done all this before.  _

“Hannie!” Seungcheol’s voice rang throughout the small shared apartment. “Hannie, we’re gonna be late if you don’t hurry up!” 

“Calm down, Cheol,” Jeonghan said as he casually walked over to the other who was already waiting by the door with his shoes on.“Beauty can’t be rushed.” He was wearing a simple button-up shirt and jeans, his long silver hair swayed with every step that he took. 

Seungcheol was wearing a plain t-shirt and ripped jeans. “You’ll have no problem being rushed then,” he snorted before pecking his boyfriend’s slightly pouted lips. “You know I hate being late.” 

The other sighed and began putting on his shoes. “I know, I know. I lost track of time.” He tied his shoelaces and stood back up facing Seungcheol. “I’m sorry.” He fluttered his eyelashes and pouted.

“You’re lucky you’re cute.” Seungcheol rolled his eyes playfully before walking out the door and didn’t even jump when Jeonghan smacked his ass. “Keep your hands to yourself,” he jokingly reprimanded. 

“Can’t I touch what’s mine?” Jeonghan smirked and winked at the other before stepping out the door. 

“If you don’t stop looking at me like that we’re never gonna make it to the party,” Seungcheol said huskily. 

Jeonghan grabbed his hand and dragged him to the elevator. “Nope, I will not allow you to waste my hard work of getting ready, Choi Seungcheol,” he said. “We are going to that damn party and when we get home, you can do anything you want to me.”

The party was at Mingyu and Wonwoo’s new home. They had just moved in together and were throwing a casual housewarming with their close friends and family; Seungcheol and Jeonghan were, of course, included in that list of close friends. They had brought with them a bottle of nice wine, not a cheap one because they were good friends. 

They were the last ones to arrive, Wonwoo and Mingyu’s parents, as well as the rest of their friend group, were already there. After greeting their friends who were playing host, they each poured a glass of wine and started on the food. Mingyu had cooked and everyone knew how good his cooking was. 

“Hyung,” Seungkwan said as he approached Seungcheol and Jeonghan with Hansol by his side, “when are the two of you getting married?” 

The sudden question caused Seungcheol to choke on his wine and Jeonghan to choke on his food. Unbeknownst to everyone, Seungcheol had already been planning to propose soon. He had already gotten the ring and had talked to Jeonghan’s parents about it. The two had already been together for five years and been living together for three so, naturally, the next step was to get married. 

“You’ve been together for a long time so everyone’s waiting for one of you to pop the question,” Hansol added matter of factly, arm casually swung around his boyfriend’s shoulders. 

“Uh, well, it’s not like we haven’t discussed it,” Seungcheol started. 

“We’re just going with the flow,” Jeonghan finished for him with a soft smile on his face. 

Seungcheol coughed. “Y-yeah.” He took a sip of his wine and pecked Jeonghan on the cheek before excusing himself to use the restroom. 

Marriage was a topic Seungcheol and Jeonghan had already discussed extensively. Whether they were ready for it to the kind of wedding they’d have. A few months ago, they had decided that they were ready for marriage seeing as how the both of them were quite stable both in their relationship and in other aspects of their lives but they didn’t have to get married right away, they didn’t have to rush anything. Even so, Seungcheol had gone out and bought a ring the very next day. The ring was a simple gold band with their initials engraved; it was something Jeonghan could wear every day without worrying about it clashing with his clothes because Seungcheol knew how his boyfriend carefully assembled his clothes daily to make sure they matched. 

Seungcheol hid the ring in a pair of jeans he no longer wore, stuffed them at the back corner of the closet and prayed Jeonghan wouldn’t decide to spontaneously spring clean their closet. Every day since he’d done that, his eyes would unconsciously flicker over to the corner where the jeans were somewhat hidden. The proposal, he decided, would be simple and private, just between the two of them to make it more intimate. He knew Jeonghan would like that. 

Every once in a while, one of them would initiate a date night. Seungcheol’s date suggestions usually involved going out to try a new restaurant that had just opened up while Jeonghan would suggest they stay in and start on a new TV series. So when Jeonghan had initiated a date involving them starting a new TV series he’d heard about from Jihoon, Seungheol’s heart flipped and he knew it would be the perfect chance to propose. 

“Just keep it nice and simple,” Joshua had advised Seungcheol. “You know he doesn't like it to be super over the top when it comes to things like this.” 

Jihoon had suggested a popular show called Stranger Things. It was an American series and it wasn't half bad from what Seungcheol could tell with what little attention he had paid to it. It wasn’t boring, his mind was just on another more important matter. 

“Hannie,” Seungcheol called out as the credits for the third episode began rolling out. “Hannie, you know I love you, right?” 

Jeonghan, wearing a confused expression, turned to face his boyfriend. “Yeah?” He cocked his head to the side. “Is something wrong, Cheol?”

The other shook his head with a small sigh and pecked Jeonghan on the forehead. “I love you so much that I don’t know what to do sometimes. Hannie, I can’t imagine my life without you in it,” he confessed, voice quivering with emotion. “I ask myself where I’d be or what kind of person I’d be without you and I honestly don’t think I’d be who I am today without you by my side.” He pulled away to look Jeonghan in the eye, the other had a small smile on his face and a tender look in his eyes. 

“Yoon Jeonghan,” he breathed out, hand reaching for the ring box in his back pocket, “will you marry me?” He opened it and Jeonghan came face to face with a silver band. 

“Cheolie,” Jeonghan grinned. “Of course I will!” He giggled at the look of relief on Seungcheol’s face as he slipped the silver band on. “Did you seriously think I’d say no, you big dummy?” 

“No,” Seungcheol mumbled before stuffing his face into the crook of Jeonghan’s neck. 

Jeonghan laughed. “How could I say no when I love you this much, Cheolie? You know there’s no one I’d rather spend the rest of my life with.” He let a small, happy sigh. “I love you.” 

Seungcheol pulled away, a grin on his face as he looked at Jeonghan. “I love you too.” 

It happened a few days before the wedding; life just sucked like that. Seungcheol was finally sitting down and writing his vows after much pestering from his husband-to-be. He wasn’t lazy, he just didn’t know how to articulate his feelings for Jeonghan into words. Either way, he had to write his vows and he’d be lying if he said he didn’t shed a couple of tears while writing. 

“Hannie, I’ve loved you so long that I don’t think I’ll know how to love anyone else,” Seungcheol read out. He knew it was cheezy but he didn’t care, Jeonghan thought his cheeziness was cute. 

He placed the paper down on the table after having read through it a few times and smiled with satisfaction. Then it came—the sound of his ringtone breaking the silence of the apartment. He got up and stretched before walking over to his phone that had been discarded on the couch. The screen was lit up with a call from an unknown number. 

“Hello?” Seungcheol said after picking up the call. 

“Is this Choi Seungcheol?” An unfamiliar female voice on the other end asked hastily. 

“Uh, yes, speaking,” Seungcheol replied, confused. “Who is this?”

“I’m calling from Gangnam General Hospital,” she said. “Yoon Jeonghan was hit by a car earlier. It’s quite serious and he’s in surgery now. We will disclose everything once you get here.” 

Seungcheol was already hurriedly slipping on his shoes, car keys in hand and wallet in his back pocket. “I’m on my way,” he declared before hanging up. 

On the drive over, he blasted some god-awful rap music CD Hansol had left behind in his car. He hated it but it was enough to deter Seungcheol’s mind away from conjuring horrible scenarios. His hands were gripping the steering wheel so tightly that his knuckles turned white and while he usually disliked Seoul’s bad traffic, right now he absolutely despised it because it was preventing him from getting to the hospital sooner and finding out his fiance’s condition sooner. Every passing minute spent stuck in traffic felt like a century to Seungcheol and the music was starting to become white noise as his negative thoughts clouded over. He needed to talk to someone so he picked up his phone and called Joshua.

“J-Josh,” Seungcheol choked out. “H-help, I’m losing my fucking mind!” 

“Woah, what’s up?” Joshua’s calm voice came through the speaker of the phone. 

“Jeonghan’s in the hospital,” the other rushed out and inhaled a sharp breath. “H-he got hit by a car and he’s in surgery. They said it was serious so I’m on my way over now.” He was biting his lip so hard that it started bleeding a bit leaving the metallic taste of blood in his mouth. “P-please talk to me because if I don’t have a distraction, my mind is going to keep telling me that Hannie is dead.” 

Joshua was understandably at a loss for words because Jeonghan was one of his best friends and this news made him worry as much as Seungcheol but he recovered and started talking to his friend about his day. Seungcheol told him that he finally wrote his vows and how he couldn’t wait for everyone to hear them. 

“Knowing you, it’s gonna be so cheezy,” Joshua snorted. 

“N-No, it’s not!” Seungcheol sighed. “Josh, I’m almost there. Please get down to the hospital, it’s Gangnam General. I-I need you.”

Joshua hummed in response and Seungcheol could hear some shuffling coming from the other end signalling that the other was moving. “I’ll call Jihoon on my way over.” 

“Thank you,” Seungcheol breathed out before hanging up. 

His mind was racing but it wasn’t registering where he was. His thoughts were filled with only Jeonghan. His legs brought him to the front counter and his mouth opened to ask where his fiance was. He followed the nurse in silence, heart pounding in his chest and his hands were trembling. Sure, he had thought about what life would be like without Jeonghan and it sure would suck but he’s never seriously thought about what he’d do if Jeonghan wasn’t around anymore. Being in this situation was filling him with so much anxiety that he almost couldn’t hear anything over the sound of his heart pounding in his ears. 

Another nurse came over to talk to him as soon as he sat down. “The driver lost control of the car and collided into Jeonghan-ssi while he was crossing the road,” she informed. “As of right now, I’m not clear on the extent of his injuries but he has broken ribs, broken arm and leg as well as a high possibility of a serious concussion.” She handed some forms to Seungcheol. “Just pass them back to me when you’re done, take your time.” She shot him a sympathetic smile before walking away. 

“Cheol!” A familiar voice called out and Seungcheol looked up to see Joshua and Woozi running towards him, both wearing equal expressions of worry. “Cheol, how is he?” 

“H-he… Br-broken r-ribs—” Seungcheol’s throat felt so tight, a loud sob came out of his mouth as his previously unshed tears came rushing down his face. Sobs wracked his body as Joshua wrapped his arms around his trembling body. “H-his p-parents…” Seungcheol had forgotten to call them.

“I already called them, they should be here soon,” Joshua told his friend. “I figured you’d be too distraught to remember.” 

Seungcheol nodded and pulled away from his friend before slumping in his seat. His tears were still flowing and his fists were clenched but he felt numb. He shut his eyes in an attempt to not take in the scene of the hospital, being here made it all too real and it made him so scared. It’s only been a little over an hour since he got the news but he felt exhausted. They still had a few more hours before the surgery was done and the doctors could come to deliver either good or bad news to them and Seungcheol still had those damn forms to go through. Right now, he wanted to wake up in his bed with his arms wrapped around Jeonghan and just let this be a nightmare he’d tell his fiance about. 

“Cheol, Han’s parents are here.” Joshua’s voice reminded him that this was reality. 

Seungcheol spent the next few hours trying not to break down in front of Jeonghan’s already distraught parents as he forced himself to read and sign the forms he had been handed. Jihoon didn’t say much, he just held Seungcheol’s hand and squeezed it every once in a while to remind him that he was here for him. The younger had already texted their group chat to inform the rest of their friends about the situation but urged them not to come because all of them showing up would crowd the waiting area. Joshua had called Seungcheol’s parents for him and he had spoken to them while insisting that them making a trip over from Daegu wouldn’t be necessary. 

The whole time, Joshua seemed to be the most composed. He hadn’t shed any tears while Jihoon had shed a couple silent ones. But Seungcheol could see the slight tremble of Joshua’s hands and he knew his friend was as worried as him, only barely hanging on by a thread. Still, Joshua held himself together and made sure they all ate something as they waited. Seungcheol had never felt more grateful to have someone like Joshua as his best friend. 

Suddenly, the light of the operating room’s ‘IN USE’ sign turned off and all of them quickly stood up in anticipation. The lead surgeon stepped out of the room and shot them a small smile. “I’m Dr Kim Hong Do,” he introduced. “Jeonghan-ssi is an induced coma at the moment but he rest assured that he will be fine.” Everyone let out a breath of relief and Jihoon’s tight grip on Seungcheol’s hand loosened a bit. “However,” Dr Kim continued, “he suffered from significant head injury which will most probably lead to amnesia but we cannot determine if it will be long term and how much he will have forgotten.”

Jihoon’s grip tightened again and Seungcheol’s did as well. After Dr Kim gave a brief explanation on how to deal with someone who has amnesia, he informed them that they were allowed to see Jeonghan and left. Seungcheol’s feet wouldn’t move but Jihoon dragged him along by the hand as they all made their way to Jeonghan’s room. 

Seungcheol’s breath hitched in his throat and he swore his heart stopped as soon as he saw Jeonghan. His beautiful fiance was laying on the bed hooked up to various machines. “I-I can’t… Jihoon, I can’t,” he choked out pausing right at the door. His legs wouldn’t move and he couldn’t bring himself to go closer. 

“Hyung…” Jihoon didn’t really know what to say in a situation like this so he looked to Joshua for help. The older sighed and walked over to Seungcheol before placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. 

“Come on, Cheol,” he encouraged in a tender voice. “You have to be strong for Hannie.” 

One step, two steps, Seungcheol slowly moved towards the bed. Jeonghan’s parents were already standing by their son’s bed, both trying to keep calm. With a trembling hand, Seungcheol reached out to take Jeonghan’s hand in his. It was so cold, too cold for Jeonghan. 

They were told that he wouldn’t wake up till tomorrow so Joshua and Jihoon decided to leave, dragging a protesting Seungcheol with them. Before they left a nurse approached them. “This belongs to Jeonghan-ssi,” she said as she held up Jeonghan’s engagement ring that had been placed in a ziplock bag. 

“Thank you,” Seungcheol mumbled before taking it and slipping it into the pocket of his jeans. 

Joshua insisted on driving Seungcheol home and staying the night because Seungcheol was ‘too distraught to do anything’. He made sure his friend took a shower, ate and slept. After the other had gone to bed and he was occupying the guest bedroom alone, he let out all his bottled up emotion and cried, called Seokmin then cried some more as his boyfriend whispered comforting words over the phone. 

The next morning, Seungcheol woke up with a bad feeling in his gut. He suspected it had something to do with Jeonghan but he tried his best to shake it off as he greeted Joshua with a smile and thanked him for everything he’s done. “That’s what friends are for,” was Joshua’s simple reply. 

Much to Seungcheol’s surprise, his own parents actually made a trip over from Daegu. “What are you guys doing here? You didn’t need to come,” he replied but he was relieved to see his parents. 

“Jeonghan is family too,” his mother replied with a small smile. 

Jeonghan had, thankfully, woken up and his parents were already in the room with him by the time Seungcheol and Joshua got to the hospital. Joshua immediately went to Seokmin’s side as soon as he spotted the younger who gave him a hug. All their other friends were there as well but they waited outside the room and insisted that Seungcheol be the only one to go in as to not overwhelm Jeonghan. Taking a deep breath and exhaling, knocked on the door before opening it and stepping into the room. Jeonghan’s parents were occupying the only two chairs in the room so he just stood by the bed, not that Seungcheol really minded. He was just glad to see his angel awake. 

“Uhm, sorry but... who are you?” Jeonghan asked, his face twisted with confusion. “Do I know you?” 

Seungcheol blinked. “Oh, uhm…” At a loss for worked, he turned to Jeonghan’s parents for help. 

“Sweetie, don’t you recognise Seungcheol?” Jeonghan’s mother asked. 

“S-Seungcheol?” Jeonghan repeated. “Mom, I don’t know a Seungcheol.” 

“Amnesia,” Seungcheol breathed out. “Jeonghan,” his fiance looked up at him, “I’m going to bring in some people and I just need you to point out the ones you recognise.” 

“O..kay?” 

The other opened the door and called for the other to come in. “Alright Jeonghan, just point out the ones you know,” Seungcheol instructed. 

“Shua, Seokminnie, Mingyu, Seungkwan and Chan,” Jeonghan replied, still confused. “Who are you guys?” He was referring to the other eight people he did not recognise who were also standing in the room.

“Hannie,” Joshua said as he took his confused friend’s hand in his, “they’re your friends.” 

“W-what?” 

“We’ll get the doctor,” Jeonghan’s father announced before leaving the room with Jeonghan’s mother following in suit. 

“Y-you really don’t remember us?” Jihoon asked in a small voice, his hand reaching out to hold Soonyoung’s for some support. 

“I’m sorry but I really don’t,” Jeonghan replied. “What’s going on?”

Jeonghan’s attending doctor, Dr Kim, walked in with a clipboard in his hand. He ordered everyone but Jeonghan’s parents to leave the room so he could ask him some questions. Once he was done, he heaved a sigh. “I’m sorry but you have amnesia Jeonghan-ssi,” he informed. “However, it might not be long term so just go about your normal life after you’re discharged and hopefully you’ll regain your memory.” 

Jeonghan’s father went out to explain the situation. “Apparently, he only remembers up till when he graduated high school,” he told them. “But it might not be long term so he might be able to regain his memories.”

“That explains why he doesn’t remember us,” Wonwoo chimed in. “He met the rest of us in college.” 

“Including me,” Seungcheol stated sadly with a large frown on his face. His heart ached. 

“Hey, come on, the doctor said he might be able to regain his memories so we’ll just have to help him as best as we can until he does,” Soonyoung chimed in, ever the optimistic presence amongst them. “Right, Jihoonie?” He turned to his boyfriend expectantly and gently nudged him.

“Y-yeah,” Jihoon replied weakly. He didn’t say it out loud but everyone knew he was upset at the fact that Jeonghan couldn’t remember them. 

“First things first, we should re-introduce ourselves to him,” Hansol suggested. 

They made their way back in the room. “I’m Wonwoo,” Wonwoo introduced. “We met when Mingyu introduced me as his boyfriend.” Jeonghan’s eyes widened a little at Wonwoo’s words.

Next up was Jun who shot Jeonghan a smile. “Jun Hui but everyone calls me Jun. I met you through Cheol-hyung.”

“I’m Seungkwan’s boyfriend Hansol but you can call me Vernon.”   


“It doesn’t make you any cooler,” Seungkwan retorted. 

“I’m Ming Hao and I met you through Jun who I’m dating,” Ming Hao briefly said. 

Jihoon took a deep breath before saying anything. “I”m Lee Jihoon and I also met you through Cheol-hyung.” 

“I did too!” Soonyoung happily chimed in. “I’m Soonyoung! Oh, and I’m dating Jihoonie.” Jeonghan chuckled a little, glad to have Soonyoung’s chirpiness around. 

Jeonghan’s eyes landed on the last person he didn’t recognise who he assumed was ‘Cheol-hyung’. Seungcheol stepped out a little and cleared his throat before speaking. “Well, I’m Seungcheol but all of my friends call me Cheol. We met after I spilt coffee on you on the first day of class and we ended up becoming… good friends.” 

From the way everyone’s heads suddenly snapped to look at Seungcheol, Jeonghan could tell he was missing something but he chose not to say anything. “Well, it’s nice to meet all of you…  again,” Jeonghan said with a small smile. 

The next few days, Seungcheol didn’t visit Jeonghan. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to, he just had other things to do. Firstly, he drove his parents back to Daegu while putting up a facade so his parents wouldn’t worry but his mom didn’t believe him one bit, not that she really said anything about it. After that, he had a wedding to call off. He called the venue, the bakery and every single guest to inform them that the wedding was off. Most of the guests were worried and asked what had happened between the couple but Seungcheol told them it was a personal matter that he couldn’t disclose. He spent those few days alone in his apartment until Seokmin and Joshua declared they were moving in temporarily because it was ‘closer to the hospital’ but Seungcheol knew it was only so they could keep an eye on him. 

Even though his fiance couldn’t remember him, even though he to call off their wedding, Seungcheol didn’t cry. Instead, he held it in, but he had to change their bedsheets so it wouldn’t smell like Jeonghan just to fall asleep. 

“I’ll go see him today,” Seungcheol announced while having breakfast with his two friends in his apartment. “I’ll go see Jeonghan.”

Seungcheol was anxious because how should he act around Jeonghan? How did he act around the other when they first? Before they were together when Seungcheol was courting him? They’ve been together so long that Seungcheol didn’t know how to be just a friend to Jeonghan. He’s been in a relationship for so long that he didn’t know how to start over. 

He knocked and entered after hearing a soft ‘come in’ from the other side. Jeonghan was awake and sitting up in his bed, the sight made Seungcheol’s heart clench. “H-hi,” he greeted lamely. “Uhm, I brought you some strawberries.” He gestured to the bag in his hand. 

“Yay, my favourite,” Jeonghan cheered, grinning at the other. “I guess we really were good friends. ” 

Seungcheol awkwardly cleared his throat as he handed the bag to Jeonghan. “Uh yeah.” 

“So Cheol,” he smiled, “what took you so long to come visit me? Everyone else already came.”

“I uhm,” Seungcheol coughed, “had some things to settle.” He nervously bit his lip.

“Oh? What kind of things?” The other raised an eyebrow in question. 

“Some… personal matters,” Seungcheol responded curtly. “Let me wash these for you.” He stood up and took the strawberry filled plastic container away from Jeonghan before heading into the connected private bathroom. 

He carefully washed the strawberries and heaved out a sigh. He headed back into the room and handed the container to Jeonghan who thanked him and started eating. “What do you do?” The other asked before taking a bit out of a strawberry.

“I’m a bank manager,” Seungcheol replied. 

“And what do I do?” 

“You’re a psychologist.” He smiled. “A pretty good one, in fact.” 

“Ah, I’ve always found the human mind fascinating,” Jeonghan hummed. “So we met after you spilt coffee on me? I must have been pretty annoyed.” 

The other chuckled. “Yeah, you were. You kept ranting on about how first impressions matter and you couldn’t go to class in a coffee stained shirt but you would be late if you went back to change.” 

“Sounds about right.” Jeonghan nodded and turned to look at him. “So what did you do?”

“I panicked a bit and I took off my shirt and gave it to you.” Seungcheol blushed at the memory. Without thinking, he had taken off his shirt in the middle of the college campus. “You were kinda dazed and I swear you checked me out before you snatched the shirt from me and ran off to your class.” He sighed and shook his head. “I really thought I’d never see you or that shirt ever again but we bumped into each other again a few days later and this time I didn’t spill coffee on you.

“You asked me for my number so you could return the shirt to me and I was more than happy to give it to you because I thought you were beau—a nice guy,” he continued and mentally cursed himself for his slip up. “We met up for coffee and you handed me back my shirt but we kept talking for hours and we became close friends after that.” Which wasn’t a lie. The two of them  _ did  _ start out as friends until Seungcheol had worked up the courage to ask Jeonghan out. 

“Hmm,” Jeonghan hummed, “I see.” He grinned before eating another strawberry. “Thank you for telling me.” 

“I-I could tell you more stories if you’d like, about you and about our friends,” Seungcheol offered, a small smile on his face. “I could tell you about the time Seokmin got stuck himself stuck in a trash can… while he was sober.”

Jeonghan had a wicked grin on his face. “Tell me everything.”

So Seungcheol did. 

For the next few days, Seungcheol dropped by for a couple of hours to talk to Jeonghan and told him more stories while sharing a hot meal. Every time Seungcheol heard the other laugh, he felt a pang in his chest; a painful feeling that was starting to become familiar to him. And he treasured the times when he would show Jeonghan pictures or videos on his phone because it meant he got to sit at the edge of the hospital bed while the other got close enough that their shoulders were touching and Seungcheol could feel Jeonghan’s body vibrating every time he let out a laugh. These moments were fleeting but he treasured them because it’s the closest he could get, the closest he would allow himself to get. 

“Why don’t you just tell him?” Joshua inquired, getting a little tired of seeing Seungcheol so down all the time. “About your relationship. He has the right to know.”

Seungcheol sighed as he peered at his half-eaten pancakes. “It’s not that simple,” he mumbles miserably. “I can’t just spring something like that on him while he’s… fragile.” 

“You know he’ll probably find out, right? Someone’s gonna accidentally let it slip and better it be you than someone else.” 

“I know,” Seungcheol said but he knew he wouldn’t be saying anything any time soon. 

He wanted to scream at Jeonghan, to scream about how much he loved him and how this entire situation was so frustrating because he couldn’t touch Jeonghan the way he wanted to. It wasn’t Jeonghan fault, it wasn’t anyone’s fault but Seungcheol wanted to blame something, someone. He blamed the universe for cursing him with the worst luck of having his fiance suffer from amnesia just a few days before their wedding. 

“You’re awfully quiet today,” Jeonghan commented off-handedly before taking a bite of the tteokbokki Seungcheol had brought for him. “I doubt you’ve run out of stories so what’s wrong, Cheol?” 

Seungcheol felt that familiar pang in his chest again but it didn’t affect him much today because he had already been walking around with a dull ache throbbing in his chest the entire day. Why? Today was their wedding. Well, it was  _ supposed  _ to be their wedding day. He had woken up and pretended he didn’t know what date it was even though he had been counting down to their wedding day and he knew exactly what day it was without even glancing at the calendar. 

“Just.. tired.” It wasn’t a lie, he  _ had  _ been tossing and turning last night. 

Jeonghan shot him a worried glance. “Did you not sleep well last night?” 

Seungcheol cleared his throat. “Yeah, something like that.” 

“You know, Cheol, you’re kinda weird,” Jeonghan told the other bluntly. “Not in a bad way but not really a good way either. Sometimes when you think I’m not looking you just kinda zone out and stare at me with this really sad look on your face like I’m breaking your heart. I know you probably pity me for being in this situation and losing my memories and all but you don’t have to.” He shot Seungcheol a small smile and the other didn’t have the heart to tell him the truth. “Just stay with me through this.”

As if Seungcheol could leave even if he wanted to. “I will,” Seungcheol promised, voice small. He allowed himself to reach out and take Jeonghan’s hand in his to give it a reassuring squeeze. He didn’t know if Jeonghan felt the sparks too but he was too scared to ask. 

As soon as Seungcheol got home, he shut the door and slumped against it. He let out a deep sigh before walking into his bedroom but upon opening his closet, he saw his and Jeonghan’s tuxedos and he just couldn’t take it anymore. His touched his own tuxedo, it was black and the material soft against his calloused hand. Jeonghan’s was navy blue and wrinkle-free unlike Seungcheol’s that had a couple of creases. He looked at his nightstand where his and Jeonghan’s rings were sitting and he felt the tears he’d been keeping in start to sliding down his face. 

He was in such agony. All he wanted to do was to marry Jeonghan and live happily ever after with him, was that too much to ask for? Sobs wracked his body as he thought about how he was so close to happily ever after, to his forever with the love of his life. His clumsily pulled out a random piece of clothing from Jeonghan’s side of their shared closet which turned out to be a shirt the other often wore to bed and he climbed onto the bed, shamelessly and desperately inhaling Jeonghan’s scent that still lingered on the shirt.

“Jeonghan… Hannie,” Seungcheol called out softly into the silence of his dark, empty apartment. “P-please come back to me. Please remember me.”

He was so scared. If Jeonghan never regained his memories, it will mean that those last few years spent together will be nothing but just memories Seungcheol will desperately cling to. It will be only him that’s left alone in the end. Seungcheol could tell him, he could but he doesn’t because he’s afraid that Jeonghan wouldn’t love him again. What if Jeonghan only fell in love with him under the circumstances they were in last time? Things are different now, Jeonghan was different and so was Seungcheol. So he doesn’t say anything because he’s a coward which is exactly what Joshua calls him when he tells him all this. 

“Stop being such a fucking coward, Cheol,” Joshua said, clearly frustrated. “He looks at you like the sun fucking shines out of your ass like you… like you fucking saved the universe twice or something!” He kinda wants to punch his best friend in the face. “There’s no way Hannie won’t love you again, Cheol. You’re stupid to even think that in the first place.” 

“I agree,” Seokmin meekly piped in. “You and Jeonghan-hyung are meant to be so there’s no way he can’t fall in love with you again, hyung.” 

“But—”

“But nothing, Cheol! Just go and get your man.”

It was easier said than done but Seungcheol’s luck seemed to finally be looking up because Jeonghan would be discharged from the hospital today and his parents insisted that he lived with Seungcheol again. The doctor said it would be best for Jeonghan to go back to his usual daily routine and that included living with Seungcheol. With that, he moved his clothes into the guest room and hid away almost all their pictures, he only left out the ones where they didn’t seem too much like a couple. Of course, he made sure to hide their rings as well as all the wedding planning stuff Jeonghan had and the piece of paper he had written his vows on. He placed them all in a box and stuck it at the back of his closet, he felt like he was hiding away the precious memories him and Jeonghan shared. 

“So, uh, this is your room,” Seungcheol said as he gestured to the master bedroom. “I left everything as it is.” He let Jeonghan walk him and sit on the bed as he continued to stand at the doorway. “My room is across from yours so let me know if you need anything.” 

They were sitting across from each other and having their first meal together when Jeonghan looked up from his spaghetti and casually asked, “So Cheol, are you seeing anybody?”

Seungcheol all but choked on his food and rushed to drink some water. Jeonghan rushed over and asked him if he was okay while patting his back. “I-I’m fine,” Seungcheol croaked out when he calmed down. “I’m fine,” he repeated, voice clearer this time and Jeonghan went back to his seat. 

“So _ are you  _ seeing anyone?” Jeonghan repeated. 

“No,” Seungcheol replied curtly before taking another bite of his spaghetti while avoiding eye contact. 

“Oh? You’re good looking and have a stable income,” the other commented. “I don’t see how you’re not taken.” 

“I was… going to get married,” Seungcheol forced out, throat feeling tight and the words leaving a bad taste on his tongue. “But something happened.” 

“Did you get left at the altar?” Jeonghan asked bluntly. 

The other shook his head. “No, nothing like that,” he replied. “We loved each other very much.”

“So what happened? Why aren’t you married now?” 

Still refusing to make eye contact, Seungcheol sighed. “Things happened. It’s complicated and I don’t want to talk about it right now.”

“Alright.” Jeonghan promptly went back to eating and brought up lighter topics to ease the obvious tension in the room.

The next day, Seungcheol took Jeonghan to his workplace. Everyone had already been informed about the situation and Seungcheol had urged them not to say anything about their relationship or engagement. Jeonghan was nice to everyone and although he had no recollection of his job, he felt bad for his patients. He spoke to his assistant and the other doctors who were treating him as if he were made of glass. On the way back, Seungcheol thought of bringing him to the fried chicken place they frequented but decided not to when he realised they knew about him and Jeonghan’s relationship and were sure to mention something. 

The days spent with Jeonghan were bittersweet; Seungcheol loved having the other near him but not being able to touch, to hold, to kiss him was agonising. When Jeonghan would smile at him, that little toothy smile of his, it made Seungcheol’s heart ache a little. Jeonghan’s laugh was like music to his ears, never failing to bring a smile to the other’s face. 

“Cut my hair for me, Cheol,” Jeonghan said. “Why did I even keep my long hair? I hate having such long hair?” 

“W-What?” Seungcheol blinked. “I thought you liked having long hair…” 

Jeonghan shot him a confused look, head slightly tilted and eyebrows furrowed. “I wanted to chop it right after I graduated, Cheol.” 

Then Seungcheol remembered; on their first date, he had mentioned how he loved Jeonghan’s long blonde hair. He absolutely loved running his fingers through it, letting the soft strands slip through his fingers. Jeonghan had kept his hair long and blonde since they got together. 

“Oh,” Seungcheol breathed out, a little pained. “I-I’ll help you cut it, Han.”

They set up in the bathroom, Jeonghan sitting on a chair surrounded by newspapers and Seungcheol stood behind him. Seungcheol ran his fingers through the other’s hair one last time, pretending to be untangling it. Then he picked up the pair of scissors and snipped off the first lock of hair. 

“Hey, you know what you’re doing right?” Jeonghan jokingly asked. 

The other chuckled. “Don’t worry, I cut Seokmin’s hair all the time.” He kept snipping away until it was a good length and when he looked up to look at Jeonghan’s reflection in the mirror, his breath hitched in his throat. That was right, no matter how long or short Jeonghan’s hair was Seungcheol thought he was beautiful all the same. Jeonghan could be bald for all he cared. 

“Oh wow, it looks good,” Jeonghan complimented, grinning. “Thanks, Cheol!” 

“No problem.” Seungcheol gently started brushing off the hair that had fell onto the other’s neck and he heard Jeonghan let out a shaky breath. Smirking to himself, he had an idea. Leaning in close to the other’s neck, he blew hot air onto the bare skin. He smiled in satisfaction as he heard Jeonghan let out another shaky breath and shudder, his neck had always been sensitive. 

“The length is okay?” Seungcheol asked, his lips still close to the skin of Jeonghan’s neck. 

“Y-Yeah,” Jeonghan stuttered. 

The other kept blowing at Jeonghan’s neck even though he had long since cleared away all the hairs. He took a chance and brought his lips closer to place a chaste kiss which made Jeonghan lose his composure and squeak in surprise. 

“W-What are you playing at, Cheol?” Jeonghan quickly turned around to the other who was looking a little too proud of himself. “If you want to kiss me just say so.” That quickly wiped the smug look off Seungcheol’s face.

Jeonghan grabbed a fistful of the other’s shirt and pulled him close to join their lips together. Slightly stunned by the sudden action, it took Seungcheol a second to respond to the kiss. His lips moved slowly and he ran his fingers through Jeonghan’s freshly cut hair slightly tugging at it because he knew the other liked that. 

“Hannie,” Seungcheol breathed out. “Hannie, I missed you.” 

Jeonghan pulled away when he felt something wet on his cheek. “Cheol, are you crying? Are you okay?”

Seungcheol blinked and quickly wiped away the tears he hadn’t realised he had shed. “I-I’m fine.” He looked at the floor. “I’ll clean up the mess. You should go rest.”

The other’s eyebrows furrowed with worry but Seungcheol couldn’t bring himself to look at Jeonghan’s face. Jeonghan placed a hand on Seungcheol’s shoulder. “Cheol, what’s wrong?”

“I said I’m fine,” Seungcheol bit out a little too harshly. “Please… please just go.”

Jeonghan didn’t understand but he silently left, his frustration slowly building up. He flopped onto his bed and heaved a deep sigh. He honestly had no idea what was Seungcheol’s problem. The guy was so hot and cold, sometimes being all over Jeonghan and other times, just completely silent in his presence. It was confusing and frustrating. 

Left alone at home while Seungcheol was at work, Jeonghan decided to tidy up a bit around the house and even did the laundry while he was at it. He arranged some of the furniture and found it weird that there were barely any pictures hung up on the walls even though there were screws on it. When he had asked Seungcheol about it, the other had replied that the screws were already there when they had moved in and neither one of them really felt like hanging up any pictures which was strange because Jeonghan loved to decorate. 

He folded up the laundry and put Seungcheol’s clothes away before clearing his. He admired the nice tuxedo hanging in his closet. He sure had good taste when it came to fashion. Gently, he began patting the tuxedo jacket to get rid of any dust it had on it then he heard a strange crumpling sound. He unbuttoned it and saw a white envelope sitting in the inner pocket of the jacket. Curiosity got the best of him as he carefully pulled it out and sat on the bed before opening it to read its content.

“Han, I’m home,” Seungcheol called out as he closed the door. There was no response. “Han?” He called out again as he began walking towards Jeonghan’s open bedroom door. The other was slumped on the floor, a frown on his face and a piece of paper in his hand. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Jeonghan croaked out. He looked up at Seungcheol, eyes red-rimmed. “Why didn’t you tell me that we were getting married? Why didn’t you tell me about us, Seungcheol?” 

Seungcheol was at a loss for words. “I-I…” 

“How long were you gonna hide it from me?” Jeonghan demanded, voice suddenly loud and angry, and Seungcheol knew he wouldn’t be able to lie his way out of this one. “Were you waiting for me to fall in love with you again before springing this on me again like ‘Oh yeah, by the way, we were actually going to get married before your accident’. What the fuck, Choi?”

“Jeonghan-ah, I’m sorry but I just couldn’t… bring myself to say anything when you were already going through so much,” Seungcheol confessed. “I wanted to, I really did but I couldn’t.” 

“Get out.” 

“Han—”

“Get the fuck out,” Jeonghan’s voice was low and dangerous which made Seungcheol gulp before scurrying out of the room. Jeonghan quickly slammed the door and locked it. 

The other sighed and figured it was best to give Jeonghan some time to cool off before trying to redeem himself. He busied himself with some work he had brought home but Jeonghan still hadn’t come out and he was starting to get anxious. Sighing, he opened up his closet and his arms stretched to the very back to pull out the box he had hidden in there. He opened it up and pulled out the slightly crumpled piece of paper he had carelessly thrown in there. He pulled it out and smoothed it over before walking over to Jeonghan’s still closed door. 

“Han,” Seungcheol called out but got no response. “Han, I’m gonna read you the vows I wrote to you because I don’t now then I don’t think I’ll ever get to.” 

He sat down on the floor, back leaned against the door and unfolded the paper. “Warning, this is gonna be super cheesy.” He chuckled before clearing his throat. “Hannie, I can’t believe we’re here. Who’d have thought spilling my coffee on you would be the best mistake I’d ever make?” He smiled fondly at the memory. “I honestly don’t know where I’d be without you. You’ve been there for me through all the tough times. Times when I felt like giving up, times when I felt like the world was against me. You were always there to say the right words and comfort me.

“Hannie, I love you so much I feel like my heart is gonna burst sometimes. Seriously, how can you love someone so much? I can’t believe I get to—”his throat started getting tighter making him choke up and his hands gripped the paper a little too tightly, slightly crumpling it“—s-spend the rest of my life with you. It’s like a dream come true.

“I just… I wanna thank you for loving me, for accepting me for who I am, flaws and everything. Hannie, I’ve been in love with you for so long that I don’t think I’d know how to love anyone else so you’re it for me, you’re my forever.” 

Seungcheol set the letter aside before wiping away his tears. “Hannie, I’m sorry and didn’t mean to hide things from you,” he said sincerely. “Maybe…maybe it’s time you moved back with your parents because you being here isn’t jogging your memory at all. W-we can be friends and maybe one day I’ll look at you and it won’t hurt anymore.” 

The sudden opening of the door caused Seungcheol to yelp and fall backwards. He looked up to see Jeonghan staring down at him, tears streaming down his face. “W-Who said I want to be friends with you?” he asked which caused Seungcheol to look away, a pained look on his face. “What if I wanted to be more, Cheol?” He sighed. “I know it sucks that I haven’t regained my old memories but it doesn’t matter. We can always make new ones.” 

Groaning, Seungcheol got off the floor and stood right in front of Jeonghan. “Come on, I’ll show you our pictures.” He offered a small smile before taking the other’s hand and bringing over to where the box sat open in his room.

They spent the next few hours sitting on the floor and going through every picture that was either framed on in a photo album. Seungcheol gave a detailed explanation on what was going on in every single picture, where they were at the time and how long ago it was taken. He also showed Jeonghan the wedding planning stuff and showed him where their venue was. 

“I feel bad,” Jeonghan said, lower lip slightly jutting out in a pout. “You had to cancel everything after we already paid and you even had to call all the guests to inform them.” 

“It couldn’t be helped.” Seungcheol leaned over and placed a chaste kiss on Jeonghan’s temple. 

Jeonghan sighed. “I’m sorry you had to go through all of that alone, Cheol.”

“You don’t have to apologise, Hannie,” the other said. “It was exhausting but it had to be done so I did it.”

Jeonghan moved back in with his parents a few days later. He wanted to spend time with his parents and get his own life sorted out before he could let himself live with Seungcheol again. They regularly texted and video called but between Jeonghan working on himself and Seungcheol’s heavy workload the two didn’t get the chance to meet up since they last saw each other. Which was why, on that fateful day, Seungcheol had decided to call Jeonghan and ask him out on a date. 

_ Everything came rushing back to him. Jeonghan’s knees gave out as the sudden flood of memories suddenly filled his mind. He crumbled to the floor, breath coming out in pants and tears streaming down his face. He didn’t register Seungcheol running over to him and wrapping his arms around his smaller frame.  _

_ “Hannie,” Seungcheol called out, voice evident with worry. “Baby, what’s wrong?”  _

_ Jeonghan looked up and took Seungcheol’s face in his hands. “C-Cheolie, I remember,” he sobbed and voice quivered. “This was where we had our first date, Cheolie. I remember everything.” _

_ “Fuck, Hannie, you really remember everything?” He pulled the other into his chest. _

_ Jeonghan nodded. “I’m so sorry you had to go through all that pain, Cheolie.”  _

_ “No, Hannie, don’t apologise,” Seungcheol mumbled into Jeonghan hair, tears of his own beginning to slide down his cheeks. “God, I missed you, Hannie.”  _

_ “I-I missed you too, Cheolie,” Jeonghan said.  _

_ Seungcheol pulled away to look at the other’s face. His face was red and splotchy, tears still rolling down his face but Seungcheol had never seen a more beautiful sight. “Welcome back, Jeonghan.” He was smiling so wide it hurt his mouth. “Fuck, I love you.” _

_ “I love you too, Cheolie.” He had a grin of his own on his face.  _


End file.
